Princess Donut
also known as GC, BWR, NW Princess Donut the Queen Anne Chonk, Donut, Crawler #4,119
A talking cat, full crawler, and designated party leader of the Royal Court, with the stats to back all three.
System message
[ NOT YET ENCOUNTERED ]
You haven't met this one yet, crawler. Records unseal as you read. The dungeon appreciates your impatience but does not reward it.
Level
5B1C10
2B1C8
1B1C2
Physical
- Build:
A cat again, perhaps slightly larger, tiara-topped, and now in possession of a speaking voice described as sultry yet pompousB1C7
Currently a quivering mass of jellied flesh labeled Waiting...; the Enhanced Pet Biscuit is remaking her into somethingB1C5
Tortoiseshell Persian show cat: flat-faced, fluffy, championship-grade chonkB1C1
Location
The floor 1 tunnels, hunting Scatterers with Carl toward a sealed doorB1C10
The floor 1 safe room, mostly in the ball pitB1C9
The safe room, having claimed loot priority on the llamaB1C8
The Tutorial Guild, having claimed the spot in front of the fireplaceB1C3
Floor 1 tunnels, mostly at Carl's sideB1C2
In Carl's arms, outside the ruins of the apartment buildingB1C1
System message
No data on this one yet. It either hasn't mattered, or it is about to.
Stats
- Charisma:
- Constitution:
- Dexterity:
- Intelligence:
- Strength:
25B1C7
2B1C7
8B1C7
18B1C9
17B1C8
16B1C7
15B1C10
11B1C7
System message
Stats unknown. Rest assured the dungeon has precise figures on exactly how underwhelming they are.
Spells
3Magic Missile: Bolts from the eyes at 5 mana a shotB1C8
Magic Missile: Bolts from the eyes, like a sci-fi blasterB1C7
Skills
7Light on Your Feet: Higher, farther pounces; field-tested at twice her old ceilingB1C9
5Good First Impression: Exactly what it sounds likeB1C7
4Back Claw: A rear-claw strikeB1C10
4Slice Attack: A claw slashB1C10
System message
No spells or skills on record. Punching things very hard is not a skill until the dungeon says it is.
History by chapter
Book 1
Chapter 1
- TAG Show Champion: Best-in-Show and Best-in-Breed, many times over
- TAG Pet: Carl's to look after, whatever she'd say about the arrangement
- LOCATION Location: In Carl's arms, outside the ruins of the apartment building
- PHYSICAL Build: Tortoiseshell Persian show cat: flat-faced, fluffy, championship-grade chonk
Chapter 2
- TAG Crawler: Registered as Crawler #4,119
- LOCATION Location: Floor 1 tunnels, mostly at Carl's side
- LEVEL Level: 1 (race Cat, class not yet assigned)
Chapter 3
- LOCATION Location: The Tutorial Guild, having claimed the spot in front of the fireplace
Chapter 5
- PHYSICAL Build: Currently a quivering mass of jellied flesh labeled Waiting...; the Enhanced Pet Biscuit is remaking her into something
Chapter 7
- STAT Charisma: 25 (+2 more every level; useless on crawlers, devastating on everyone else)
- STAT Dexterity: 8 (her lifelong natural stat, now locked)
- STAT Constitution: 2 (permanently, barring gear or race change)
- STAT Intelligence: 16 (11 from Enhanced Growth, +5 from the crown)
- STAT Strength: 11
- PHYSICAL Build: A cat again, perhaps slightly larger, tiara-topped, and now in possession of a speaking voice described as sultry yet pompous
- TAG Party Leader: Designated by the system: highest combined stat total
- SKILL Good First Impression: Exactly what it sounds like (All 5 from the Crown of the Sepsis Whore)
- SPELL Magic Missile: Bolts from the eyes, like a sci-fi blaster (Self-taught from a tome before the tutorial reached the subject)
Chapter 8
- LOCATION Location: The safe room, having claimed loot priority on the llama
- SPELL Magic Missile: Bolts from the eyes at 5 mana a shot (Leveled by casting; fired exclusively from Carl's shoulder)
- STAT Intelligence: 17 (and with it, 17 mana; missiles cost 5, regenerating one per minute)
- LEVEL Level: 2 (Enhanced Growth auto-distributed: no points to spend)
Chapter 9
- STAT Intelligence: 18 (+1 from the Talisman of the Slate Butterfly)
- LOCATION Location: The floor 1 safe room, mostly in the ball pit
- SKILL Light on Your Feet: Higher, farther pounces; field-tested at twice her old ceiling (3 innate, +4 from the Talisman of the Slate Butterfly)
Chapter 10
- LOCATION Location: The floor 1 tunnels, hunting Scatterers with Carl toward a sealed door
- SKILL Back Claw: A rear-claw strike (Self-reported, same as Slice Attack)
- SKILL Slice Attack: A claw slash (Self-reported; first mentioned this chapter)
- STAT Strength: 15 (Growing every level from Enhanced Growth; Carl can feel it through his jacket now)
- LEVEL Level: 5 (Enhanced Growth auto-distributes; still nothing to spend)
Groups
- Party:
Leader of The Royal Court of Princess Donut, titled Grand Champion Best in DungeonB1C7
Auto-grouped with Carl on entry, whatever the system thinks the hierarchy isB1C4
Relationships
- Carl:
- Mordecai:
Her person, admitted out loud, once, under duress; she's scared and doesn't want to be aloneB1C8
Her fellow crawler; stayed at his side through the chase, which surprised them bothB1C2
The ex's boyfriend who feeds her; sits on his lap strictly on her own termsB1C1
Mutual antipathy; his mother's ashes are now her litter boxB1C3
System message
No known associates. Loners have historically excellent odds. That was sarcasm.
History by chapter
Book 1
Chapter 1
- RELATIONSHIP Carl: The ex's boyfriend who feeds her; sits on his lap strictly on her own terms
Chapter 2
- RELATIONSHIP Carl: Her fellow crawler; stayed at his side through the chase, which surprised them both
Chapter 3
- RELATIONSHIP Mordecai: Mutual antipathy; his mother's ashes are now her litter box
Chapter 4
- GROUP Party: Auto-grouped with Carl on entry, whatever the system thinks the hierarchy is
Chapter 7
- GROUP Party: Leader of The Royal Court of Princess Donut, titled Grand Champion Best in Dungeon
Chapter 8
- RELATIONSHIP Carl: Her person, admitted out loud, once, under duress; she's scared and doesn't want to be alone
Equipped
- Crown of the Sepsis Whore:
Worn permanently, by the item's own rules and her own taste; it's purpleB1C7
Jewelry
- Talisman of the Slate Butterfly:
Clipped to her collar ring; jingles when she movesB1C9
System message
Nothing equipped. Entering the World Dungeon in this condition was certainly a choice.
Inventory
Healing Potion: A coupleB1C7
Pet Biscuit: A pileB1C7
Torch: SeveralB1C7
×1Poor Llama Skin: Quality: poorB1C8
×1Uncooked Llama Steak: Filed under Food ItemsB1C8
Gold Magic Item Box: Opened: 25 potions of mana restoration and the Talisman of the Slate ButterflyB1C9
×25Mana Potion: Restores magic pointsB1C9
System message
Inventory empty. You know you still gotta eat, right?
History by chapter
Book 1
Chapter 7
- EQUIPMENT Crown of the Sepsis Whore: Worn permanently, by the item's own rules and her own taste; it's purple (From her Legendary Quadruped Box)
- INVENTORY Pet Biscuit: A pile (From the Silver Adventurer Box)
- INVENTORY Torch: Several (From her boxes; each one received with an offended hiss)
- INVENTORY Healing Potion: A couple (From her bronze boxes; exact count unstated)
Chapter 8
- INVENTORY Uncooked Llama Steak: Filed under Food Items (Second pick of the llama loot)
- INVENTORY Poor Llama Skin: Quality: poor (First pick of the llama loot; she dealt 71% of the damage)
Chapter 9
- INVENTORY Mana Potion: Restores magic points (From her Gold Magic Item Box)
- EQUIPMENT Talisman of the Slate Butterfly: Clipped to her collar ring; jingles when she moves (From her Gold Magic Item Box)
- INVENTORY Gold Magic Item Box: Opened: 25 potions of mana restoration and the Talisman of the Slate Butterfly (For being among the first 100 crawlers to level Magic Missile to 3)
Notable quotes
“Really, Carl. If you’re going to insist upon wearing that hideous cloak in public, you might want to do yourself the dignity of putting pants on first. I just can't fathom why Miss Beatrice hired you in the first place.”
“You need to assist me to this 18th level, so I can exit this hellscape and resume my rightful place as liege.”
“It’s purple. Purple is my color.”
“It sounds to me like the computer fancies you.”
“What is this magical place? That’s the biggest cat tree I’ve ever seen!”
“I want on that show, Carl.”
“Go back to bed. I need several more hours. That is an order from your princess.”
“While Miss Beatrice and I don’t always see eye-to-eye on certain policy decisions of the household, I must agree with her on this one. Cigarettes are disgusting.”